Processing Positive Experiences
Why Processing Positive Experiences is SO Important
Failing to take full and proper account of any positive experiences in your life can lead you to automatically disqualify experiences that would normally contribute to your health and mental well-being. This is something that we encounter on a daily basis here at the TranceForm clinic and we never ceased to be amazed by how many people seem to totally ignore the incredible things they achieve everyday!
If you only measure success by the number of Nobel Peace prizes that have been awarded, then it’s unlikely that the global population ever achieve anything. If, on the other hand, you measure success by getting to the top of a steep hill, then everybody can succeed and feel great about it. It’s a matter of perspective!
Examples of Disqualifying Positive Experiences
You believe that you’re worthless and talentless. When you get promoted at work you think to yourself, ‘This really doesn’t count because anybody could do this job’. As a result you feel disappointed rather than feeling pleased.
You tell yourself that you’re pathetic. When a friend tells you that you’ve been a really good and valuable friend you disqualify the experience by telling yourself that, ‘He’s only saying that because he feels sorry for me which proves just how pathetic I really am.’
Change the Filter
Rather than automatically consigning everyday positive events or compliments to the ‘meaningless’ bin, try to develop a new habit of actually noting down the experiences that made you feel good. Try the following:
Become Aware of Your ‘Positive’ Filter
Try to think about the experiences that you automatically ‘write-off’ and try to accept compliments with less criticism. Isn’t it possible that you got promotes at work because (1) you really are that skilled, and (2) you’ve worked hard and thoroughly deserve it?
Accept the Gift of Compliments
Rather than rejecting the nice things that friends and colleagues say to you learn to accept them like a nice gift with a simple ‘Thank You’. We often believe that our friends don’t really know us and that only we know our own true value, but in reality, our own self-perception is almost always the most distorted one!
Transform Your Thinking & Start Processing Positive Experiences
If you want to learn to start processing positive experiences more effectively then we highly recommend following either our Advanced Cognitive Behavioural Therapy course with Paul, or the Changing Limiting Beliefs (CLB) Programme with Joan.
Both the CBT course and Changing Limiting Beliefs approach are highly successful & pragmatic psychological training programmes, run over 10 sessions, that will teach you everything you need to know to understand your problem, identify how unhelpful thinking and limiting beliefs might be reinforcing the issue, and then show you how to make any changes to your unhelpful thinking styles or maladaptive safety behaviours that you may have developed as part of your coping strategies.
Our CBT programme is an evidence-based, research supported approach used by mental health practitioners around the World.
FREE Initial Consultations for Processing Positive Experiences
We offer all prospective clients a FREE initial assessment to chat about your limiting beliefs and how these might be stopping you from processing positive experiences.
During this 50 minute consultation we will discuss the various options that are available to you and make a considered recommendation based on your individual personal circumstances.
At TranceForm we believe that therapy & coaching should be a collaboration between therapist and client so it’s very important to be able to meet PRIOR to agreeing any kind of help. Our policy is to help people make a fully balanced & considered decision about undertaking therapy with us, including both the financial and personal implications.
For most mental health issues we recommend following our 10 session Tranceformental CBT Programme (an advanced version of conventional Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) to overcome a wide range of mental health and behavioural problems.
CBT is a proven form of therapy for developing a fundamental level of understanding into the dynamics of your problem, but also for learning new coping skills and strategies for sustainable change over your life.
Tranceformental CBT is available On-line as well as in the clinic.
Visit Online Counselling for more details.